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SHADYXV - Eminem |
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I'm liable to start a violent |
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spark with a silent thought |
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I disgust you like dialogue |
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from The Shop to The Wired Frog |
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Night club, *******t, |
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I was taught if your CD's on fire |
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You had to put it out yourself |
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like Highland Park, |
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no fire department |
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So you might not hear sirens at all |
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But don't be alarmed |
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if I sound off |
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Something just ain't right with me, dawg |
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A martyr on a private charter, |
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whose life could be harder? |
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Widely regarded highly, bite me, |
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sweetheart, I'm slightly retarded |
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But tonight I'm starting *******t, |
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I'm feeling self righteous |
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I might just hop in a mosh pit on some |
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Mike Tyson and Pac *******t |
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Looking to box with anybody, |
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disorderly conduct |
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I'll ******* around and snort a key |
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and pick a fight with a locksmith |
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Fan of the LOX, bananas, |
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manic, I'm going in shock |
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Frantic, I'm trapped in a closet |
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Panic attack |
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cause I'm claustrophobic |
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|
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No, *******, |
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I mean I can't maneuver |
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from movement |
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Cause I have no room for improvement |
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I'm practically squashed, |
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unpacked it and boxed it |
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Toxic, hands are arsenic, |
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flammable bars, examine the content |
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Bar exam, start of insanity |
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Charles Hamilton slash Manson and Bronson |
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|
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Animal snarls, cannibal jaws |
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Shark mandibles, |
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lambs to the slaughter |
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Looking scamp as Hannibal stalking |
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Anthony Hopkins |
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with his hands in his pockets |
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|
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Black out, Zach Galifianakis, |
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gallons of Vodka |
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But that gal has some knockers |
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I bet you they ring a bell |
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when I come back |
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and I'm conscious |
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|
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What happened, doc? |
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I passed out again |
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Alcohol's making me |
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break into vacant's naked |
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Stole a Magnum box |
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and bag Cirocs in back of a Datsun |
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Fell asleep watching Fear Factor |
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and Scare Tactics |
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Too close to the StairMaster |
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Poked a hole in the air |
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mattress and popped it |
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Woke up shortly thereafter, hungover |
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No underwear, |
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grasping a Bayer Aspirin and dropped it |
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Air Max in my closet, |
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preposterous Nikes made out of ostrich |
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And the cross stitching is a cross mixing |
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Of a rhinoceros, possum skin, |
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giraffe and a dolphin |
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been Fin Dockers, OshKoshes, |
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drop crotches |
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Swatch watches and sneakers |
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matches with the Parkers |
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But it's like being overstaffed |
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at a boxing gym |
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With all these trainers, |
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but I don't have any boxers |
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And I'm standing here naked, |
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hangover, still wasted |
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Like paper you write raps on, |
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obnoxious |
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Yo, why does it always sound |
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like I'm grabbing my nostrils? |
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******* that, I'll battle 'em all, |
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I'll battle a mall |
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|
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I'll stand there |
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and yell that at a wall |
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Until the mannequin doll scatter |
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and the inanimate objects |
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That I'm battering all shatter and fall |
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Cause I hear the track |
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and I'm starting to get ******* amped |
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I'mma spark plug, |
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I'm like the car |
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with the cables hooked up |
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to my ******* back, I'm a Duracell |
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But I sure as hell got it backwards |
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cause y'all could get jumped |
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And I'd catch the battery charge, but |
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|
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I got a hunch like your back |
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when it's arching |
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When I start attacking your squadron |
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You'll feel like MasterCard |
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when I'm charging |
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So take a swipe at me, |
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I'm coming straight at you |
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Like Clay Matthews |
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from the Green Bay Packers |
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So get the sack of Wisconsin |
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That's nutbag that I'm talking, |
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who am I kidding? |
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You *******s are all gonna do my bidding |
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Don't get dragged to the auction |
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Neiman Marcus, |
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bags of Vuitton and all |
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I'll push a ******* into oncoming traffic, |
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just watch this |
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Stretched, tinted, black sedan my ass |
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See how mad you act |
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when I drop you off at Saks Fifth Ave |
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In a ******* taxi cab to go shopping |
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Affable guy next door is laughable |
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My next whore's gonna |
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have mechanical arms |
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That'll jack me off |
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with a lotion dispenser |
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with a motion sensor |
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No emotion hence |
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I guess this sick ******* dies hard |
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I got a Magic Johnson |
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|
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It's like a Magic Wand allows me |
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to not let a blonde arouse me |
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If Ronda Rousey was on the couch |
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with the condoms out |
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Holding a thousand Magnums |
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at once to pounce me |
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I'll laugh in response to |
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how she dances and flaunts it around me |
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Her flat little badonkadonk |
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is bouncing around |
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And all I see is Paulie Malign now, |
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she's slaughterhouse in a blouse |
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And Madonna with mud on her, |
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God dammit I am misogynist |
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I slap Linda Ronstadt with a lobster, |
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throw her off a balcony |
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Just so happens she's fond of algae |
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Cause now she's faceplants on the concrete |
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Complete lack of responsibility |
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Half you assholes ain't strong |
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enough to pick up a spirit |
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*******t, you fags couldn't shoplift |
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at a thrift shop |
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But I let the track lift 'em up, |
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boost the energy |
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Klepto, I'm back to rip shop up, |
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but my thing is this now |
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Five-finger discount |
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Been rapping so long |
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I've been killing this *******t, it's easy |
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Kidnapping your mom |
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cause I'm still in this *******, thievery |
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Ransom for JonBenét Ramsey, |
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Chandra Levy, and Gary Condit |
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("Em") Paul was scared that |
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if I went back to the blonde |
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I might relapse, get on some bull*******t |
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Perhaps I'll launch some cracker |
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taunts at Action Bronson |
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Macklemore, Mac Miller and Asher Roth |
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And have some back and forths |
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And record a wack response |
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to Kendrick Lamar's "Control" verse |
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And perform "Fack" in concert |
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|
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Yo, I put that *******t on a greatest hits album |
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Now that was awesome |
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It takes some massive ******* |
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to do some *******t like that |
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Sometimes I have to ponder |
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why people are like |
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(I'll stick around) |
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And put up with my crap so long for |
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What's the attraction, mama? |
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Is it the fact that I'm a walking, |
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talking, actual quadruple entendre |
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Or the pointy nose |
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that's pointing at you, mama? |
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Who knows at this point, |
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it's always poking so meh |
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Still get along with this voice |
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cause that's the monster |
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So do-si-do with a sociopath, |
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everyone who knows me knows that |
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What they don't know is the fact Rihanna |
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calls me Pinocchio, meh |
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She loves the way I lie |
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Sits on my face |
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and waits for my nose to grow |
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Pathological liar, |
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oh, why am I such an asshole |
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That my disguise is pants, |
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but they on fire |
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So am I-a, wooh, Cappadonna, |
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cut the track off |
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|
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Sabotage Christmas, |
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crap in your stocking |
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I'm wrapping up all the presents |
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In ******* camouflage |
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so you can't even find 'em |
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Jack Santa Claus, |
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snap Rudolph's antlers off |
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Wrap his schnoz in gauze |
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bandage and blind him |
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Blowing the head gasket at Bed, |
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Bath and Beyond |
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Put the basket back |
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while the bath salt packets are gone, I |
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Know you really tired of me |
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sampling Billy Squier |
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But classic rock acid rap is the genre |
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Got Slash on guitar, |
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spla*******ng Bizarre, |
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Thrasher and Aerosmith |
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And I'm a spectacular archer, |
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feed count Dracula Chocula |
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Godzilla, half dragon and Bob Dylan |
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Bandwagoners, |
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I'm kicking the damn stragglers off |
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