[00:07.3] |
Greetings |
[00:14.2] |
My name's yours |
[00:16.50] |
What's Alaska |
[00:29.5] |
Everybody welcome to the show |
[00:34.3] |
The rules of engagement are really quite simple |
[00:37.1] |
So if you can pull yourself away from grindr for two seconds |
[00:40.22] |
Listen up |
[00:41.43] |
The use of flash photography is strictly mandatory |
[00:46.10] |
Do you think I look like this just so I can exist in your feeble memory |
[00:50.96] |
Take a picture and I'll last forever |
[00:54.68] |
Get your drinks now people |
[00:56.58] |
The more you drink the prettier we look |
[01:00.89] |
Is this your boyfriend honey |
[01:04.11] |
Not anymore |
[01:06.67] |
Tipping is compulsory |
[01:09.1] |
If you don't know what compulsory means |
[01:11.23] |
I'll spell it out for you "Tip These Men" |
[01:15.72] |
It takes a lot of money to look this cheap darling |
[01:19.28] |
Be kind to your entertainers |
[01:23.44] |
If you see a flaw squint |
[01:25.91] |
If you see a bulge don't be mad |
[01:28.16] |
Some of the most beautiful women in the world have gigantic penises |
[01:32.29] |
If you see something you don't like |
[01:34.32] |
Something unseemly or offensive |
[01:36.44] |
Something vile or disgusting |
[01:38.71] |
We'll be happy to take your complaints after the show |
[01:41.40] |
At the corner of f**k you and go f**k yourself avenuecom I'll see you there |
[01:47.5] |
Bring a sweater |
[01:49.34] |
If you think you can do better sweetheart I implore you |
[01:52.77] |
Put on a wig and mash your mouth around to other people's music for four and a half minutes |
[01:57.73] |
It's not as easy as it looks |
[01:59.40] |
Do you need a hairpiece |
[02:01.2] |
Here you can borrow mine |
[02:03.40] |
Show generosity to these monstrosities |
[02:06.79] |
Respect kindness compassion |
[02:11.21] |
And most of all whenever possible |
[02:15.49] |
Tell us we look gorgeous |
[02:19.33] |
Tell us we look gorgeous |
[02:23.2] |
Tell me I look gorgeous |
[02:27.4] |
Do I look gorgeous |
[02:29.37] |
Yeah |
[02:30.17] |
Okay but how about sexy |
[02:32.18] |
Yeah |
[02:34.4] |
Okay alright but how about sensual |
[02:36.60] |
Yeah |
[02:37.98] |
Alright but how about breathtaking geez |
[02:41.22] |
Yeah |
[02:41.90] |
I swear it's like pulling teeth to get a little tiny compliment out of you people |
[02:46.16] |
Now let's review everybody |
[02:49.25] |
Your makeup is terrible |
[02:51.91] |
If you're not wearing nails you're not doing drag |
[02:54.18] |
Don't ever touch my hair |
[02:55.64] |
Anus |
[02:56.56] |
I love your pussy |
[02:57.52] |
Give me all your money |
[02:58.70] |
Absolutely |
[03:00.58] |
Come on nature come on come on buildup okay |
[03:08.16] |
Hieeee |
[03:14.73] |
Hieeee |
[03:22.20] |
Hieeee |
[03:28.19] |
Everybody everywhere |
[03:30.01] |
Everybody everywhere |
[03:31.18] |
Hieeee |
[03:34.83] |
Hieeee |
[03:36.13] |
Hieeee |
[03:36.68] |
Hieeee |
[03:37.57] |
Hieeee |
[03:38.14] |
Hieeee |