| [00:00.66][Intro] |
|
| [00:01.39] |
Everybody shut up, WOO! |
| [00:06.93] |
Everyone listen up! |
| [00:10.57] |
Hey, hey, hey |
| [00:11.41] |
Hey, hey, hey |
| [00:13.46] |
Hey, hey, hey |
| [00:14.63][Verse 1] |
|
| [00:17.31] |
If you can't write in the proper way |
| [00:21.63] |
If you don't know how to conjugate |
| [00:25.24] |
Maybe you flunked that class |
| [00:27.55] |
And maybe now you find |
| [00:29.52] |
That people mock you online |
| [00:32.29][Bridge] |
|
| [00:33.03] |
Okay, now here's the deal |
| [00:35.55] |
I'll try to educate ya |
| [00:37.47] |
Gonna familiarize |
| [00:39.39] |
You with the nomenclature |
| [00:41.40] |
You'll learn the definitions |
| [00:43.39] |
Of nouns and prepositions |
| [00:45.45] |
Literacy's your mission |
| [00:47.36][Chorus] |
|
| [00:48.10] |
And that's why I think it's a good time |
| [00:50.95] |
To learn some grammar |
| [00:52.92] |
Now, did I stammer |
| [00:54.66] |
Work on that grammar |
| [00:56.26] |
You should know when |
| [00:59.15] |
It's "less" or it's "fewer" |
| [01:00.91] |
Like people who were |
| [01:02.79] |
Never raised in a sewer |
| [01:04.67] |
I hate these word crimes |
| [01:07.03] |
Like I could care less |
| [01:08.80] |
That means you do care |
| [01:11.87] |
At least a little |
| [01:12.84] |
Don't be a moron |
| [01:14.73] |
You'd better slow down |
| [01:16.58] |
And use the right pronoun |
| [01:19.26] |
Show the world you're no clown |
| [01:20.27][Verse 2] |
|
| [01:20.84] |
Say you got a "It" |
| [01:22.13] |
Followed by apostrophe, "s" |
| [01:24.29] |
Now what does that mean? |
| [01:26.55] |
You would not use "it’s" in this case |
| [01:28.65] |
As a possessive |
| [01:30.38] |
It's a contraction |
| [01:32.07] |
What's a contraction? |
| [01:34.07] |
Well, it's the shortening of a word, or a group of words |
| [01:36.31] |
By the omission of a sound or letter |
| [01:36.95][Bridge] |
|
| [01:37.23] |
Okay, now here's some notes |
| [01:38.46] |
Syntax you’re always mangling |
| [01:40.34] |
No X in "Espresso" |
| [01:42.07] |
Your participle's danglin' |
| [01:44.16] |
But I don't want your drama |
| [01:46.26] |
If you really wanna |
| [01:48.27] |
Leave out that Oxford comma |
| [01:49.62][Chorus] |
|
| [01:50.21] |
"be", "see", "are", "you" |
| [01:52.81] |
Are words, not letters |
| [01:56.29] |
Get it together |
| [01:58.18] |
Use your spellchecker |
| [01:59.81] |
You should never |
| [02:01.91] |
Write words using numbers |
| [02:03.50] |
Unless you're seven |
| [02:05.46] |
Or your name is Prince |
| [02:07.47] |
I hate these word crimes |
| [02:09.74] |
You really need a |
| [02:11.58] |
Full-time proofreader |
| [02:13.36] |
You dumb mouthbreather |
| [02:15.25] |
Well, you should hire |
| [02:17.57] |
Some cunning linguist |
| [02:19.10] |
To help you distinguish |
| [02:21.01] |
What is proper English |
| [02:22.52][Verse 3] |
|
| [02:23.17] |
One thing I ask of you |
| [02:24.98] |
Time to learn your homophones is past due |
| [02:27.17] |
Learn to diagram a sentence too |
| [02:29.05] |
Always say to whom |
| [02:30.21] |
Don't ever say to who |
| [02:31.17] |
And listen up when I tell you this |
| [02:33.03] |
I hope you never use quotation marks for emphasis |
| [02:35.15] |
You finished second grade |
| [02:36.37] |
I hope you can tell |
| [02:37.24] |
If you're doing good or doing well |
| [02:38.93] |
Figure out the difference |
| [02:41.11] |
Irony is not coincidence |
| [02:42.89] |
And, I thought that you'd gotten it through your skull |
| [02:44.85] |
What's figurative and what's literal |
| [02:46.82] |
Oh but, just now, you said |
| [02:48.86] |
You "literally couldn't get out of bed" |
| [02:51.03] |
That really makes me want to literally |
| [02:52.72] |
Smack a crowbar upside your stupid head |
| [02:54.45][Chorus] |
|
| [02:54.85] |
I read your e-mail |
| [02:56.99] |
It's quite apparent |
| [02:58.83] |
Your grammar's errant |
| [03:00.58] |
You're incoherent |
| [03:02.50] |
Saw your blog post |
| [03:04.45] |
It's really fantastic |
| [03:06.66] |
That was sarcastic (Oh, psych!) |
| [03:08.66] |
’Cause you write like a spastic |
| [03:10.19] |
I hate these Word Crimes |
| [03:12.89] |
Your prose is dopey |
| [03:14.78] |
Think you should only |
| [03:16.46] |
Write in emoji |
| [03:18.37] |
Oh, you're a lost cause |
| [03:20.89] |
Go back to preschool |
| [03:22.56] |
Get out of the gene pool |
| [03:24.32] |
Try your best to not drool |
| [03:25.98][Outro] |
|
| [03:26.58] |
Never mind, I give up |
| [03:28.86] |
Really now, I give up |
| [03:33.29] |
Hey, hey, hey |
| [03:35.45] |
Hey, hey, hey |
| [03:37.45] |
Go Away! |
