| [00:00.411] |
Hey,hon?Would you help me get the plates down? |
| [00:03.046] |
Yeah.Hey,here’s an idea. |
| [00:05.091] |
Why don’t we use our wedding china today? |
| [00:07.029] |
No, I just think we should save our china |
| [00:08.457] |
for something really special. |
| [00:08.960] |
Like if the queen of England comes over. |
| [00:13.479] |
Honey,she keeps canceling on us.Take the hint. |
| [00:17.640] |
What if something get broken?They’re so expensive. |
| [00:19.791] |
What is the point of having them if we never use them? |
| [00:23.079] |
Okay.But if something get broken and then the queen comes over. |
| [00:26.081] |
I will explain it to her. |
| [00:27.609] |
Like I’d let you talk to the queen. |
| [00:31.979] |
Wow,the parade is really good this year. |
| [00:35.070] |
Man,those horses can crap. |
| [00:38.742] |
Next up is a marching band from Muskoqee,Oklahoma. |
| [00:41.181] |
Muskoqee?That’s like four hours from Tulsa! |
| [00:46.577] |
And here’s the float with the stars of the popular daytime soap..Days of Our Lives. |
| [00:51.835] |
Oh,my God!! |
| [00:57.414] |
Aren’t you one of the stars of the popular daytime soap Days of our Lives? |
| [01:00.591] |
Yeah. I forgot! I’m supposed to be there! |
| [01:05.878] |
I can’t believe I forgot! |
| [01:07.046] |
I usually write stuff like this down on my arm! |
| [01:12.145] |
Stupid long sleeves! |
| [01:16.280] |
What are you gonna do? |
| [01:17.717] |
I’ll come up with a good reason why I wasn’t there. |
| [01:21.463] |
The producer are gonna be mad. |
| [01:23.117] |
They sat us down and said:“Everyone has to be there,6 a.m. sharp.That means you,Tribbiani.” |
| [01:29.364] |
Like I was some kind of idiot. |
| [01:34.136] |
Well,you proved them wrong. |
| [02:25.269] |
Oh,Emma |
| [02:27.421] |
This is your first Thanksgiving.What are you thank for?Mommy’s boobies? |
| [02:35.881] |
A lot of people are thankful for those. |
| [02:39.703] |
Hello? Rachel? |
| [02:43.201] |
Who is it? |
| [02:44.390] |
It’s your favorite sister. |
| [02:47.073] |
Jill?- Amy!- |
| [02:50.094] |
Hide my rings. |
| [02:56.975] |
Amy! Happy Thanksgaving. |
| [03:05.174] |
Do you have a hair straightener? |
| [03:12.142] |
Hair straightener. |
| [03:14.959] |
I haven’t seen you in like a year |
| [03:16.887] |
I know. I know. I’ve just been crazed. |
| [03:19.862] |
Well,me too. I had a baby |
| [03:23.007] |
I decorated Dad’s office. |
| [03:26.015] |
Yeah? Well,unless you pushed a desk out of your vagina, not the same thing. |
| [03:32.722] |
Listen, about that hair straightener,honey I really need. I’m gonna have dinner at my boyfriend’s house. |
| [03:39.358] |
Oh my God. |
| [03:41.540] |
Is this Emmett? |
| [03:48.559] |
It’s Emma. |
| [03:49.871] |
It’s a girl? |
| [03:53.344] |
Hey Amy. |
| [03:54.569] |
Amy,you remember Ross? |
| [03:57.211] |
Not really. |
| [03:59.355] |
But you are much cuter than that geeky guy she used to date. |
| [04:05.911] |
That was me.No, he was this creepy guy from high school |
| [04:11.085] |
who had this huge crush on her since, like, the ninth grade. |
| [04:14.723] |
Still me |
| [04:17.761] |
No, I’m not talking about you. |
| [04:19.267] |
It was your fat friend’s brother with that bad Afro. |
| [04:22.144] |
Okay Amy. I’m gonna save you time, okay? |
| [04:24.197] |
All me! |
| [04:30.828] |
Careful.Careful.Careful |
| [04:36.789] |
I’ll tell you what, for the rest of our lives.I’ll be careful until told otherwise. |
| [04:43.881] |
This isn’t the china we picked out. I know. |
| [04:46.400] |
After you left the store, I chose different ones. |
| [04:50.263] |
Why? - No offense, honey. |
| [04:51.762] |
but your taste is a little feminine for me. |
| [04:54.251] |
Suddenly flowers are feminine? |
| [04:58.368] |
Hey,everybody! Happy Thanksgiving! |
| [05:01.327] |
Happy Thanksgiving.Phoebe! |
| [05:03.884] |
What’s going on.Joe? |
| [05:04.845] |
Listen. I need a good lie. |
| [05:07.946] |
How about the whole “man walking on the moon”thing, you know?“ |
| [05:12.713] |
You can see the strings people! |
| [05:16.532] |
No,no,no. I need a good lie to explain why I wasn’t at a work thing today. |
| [05:20.461] |
Honey you stink at lying. |
| [05:22.382] |
I do not. |
| [05:23.362] |
Really? Let me ask you something. |
| [05:24.819] |
Yesterday at the coffeehouse..I went to the bathroom and when I came back, my muffin was gone.Who took it? |
| [05:31.864] |
Somebody opened the door to the coffeehouse..and a raccoon ran in |
| [05:36.619] |
And went straight for your muffin. I said:“Hey don’t eat that!That’s Phoebe’s!” |
| [05:40.265] |
And he said: |
| [05:43.855] |
He said,”Joey, you stink at lying.” |
| [05:46.396] |
What am I gonna do? |
| [05:48.104] |
Don’t worry.We’ll come up with a lie. |
| [05:49.666] |
I’ll help you practice. |
| [05:50.550] |
Great.That’d be great.Thank you |
| [05:52.433] |
Sure. What was the work thing? |
| [05:55.846] |
“Pick up Grandma at the airport.” -Oh ,man! |
| [06:03.079] |
She‘s precious. |
| [06:05.435] |
Do you ever worry that she’s gonna get your real nose? |
| [06:09.199] |
Amy.. |
| [06:12.149] |
Yes I do. I really do. |
| [06:19.054] |
Hello? Yeah, hang on, one sec. Can I take this upstairs? |
| [06:24.501] |
Sure. We don’t live there, but.. |
| [06:28.059] |
Seriously? It’s just these rooms? |
| [06:32.388] |
I thought you were a doctor. |
| [06:34.350] |
Yean no. Ross has a Ph.D. |
| [06:41.938] |
God.. She is unbelievable |
| [06:45.175] |
I know. I mean, a PhD is just as good as an MD |
| [06:48.436] |
Sure. Ross,yeah! |
| [06:50.438] |
If I have a heart attack at a restaurant,I want you there with your fossil brush. |
| [06:57.291] |
Stupid Thanksgiving.-What? What ?What happened? |
| [07:00.937] |
My boyfriend canceled on me. |
| [07:02.825] |
I mean, I finally find a real relationship, someone that I can spend this day with, and then his wife comes back into town! |
| [07:10.570] |
I swear,it’s almost not even worth dating married guys. |
| [07:14.237] |
Don’t say that. |
| [07:18.505] |
God, I was so looking forward to this. |
| [07:20.136] |
It was gonna be such a beautiful Thanksgiving. |
| [07:23.339] |
We were gonna have sushi. |
| [07:27.105] |
Amy..don’t cry |
| [07:30.521] |
Ross,can I talk to you in private? |
| [07:32.807] |
Sure, you wanna go upstairs, or? |
| [07:39.241] |
Look. I was thinking. If it’s okay with Monica.. |
| [07:41.818] |
I would like to invite Amy to Thanksgiving. |
| [07:45.473] |
You know, I think that’s a great idea. It‘ll be like the Pilgrims bringing the Indians syphilis. |
| [07:52.638] |
Look. I know she’s a little tough to take. |
| [07:54.539] |
But she has nowhere to go and she’s my sister. She’s Emma’s aunt. |
| [08:00.374] |
And I would like them to bond. |
| [08:02.589] |
Ok,fine. I don’t want them bonding too much. |
| [08:05.710] |
I don't want her telling Emma she needs a nose job. |
| [08:08.061] |
Ross you know what she may need one.We’re just gonna have to make our peace with that! |
| [08:19.611] |
Hey you guys. This is my sister Amy. |
| [08:25.259] |
This is Chandler.Joey.Phoebe. and you know Mon. |
| [08:29.310] |
Oh my god. You‘re on Days of Our lives! |
| [08:33.308] |
Yeah |
| [08:34.933] |
Wow! They must put a lot of makeup on you! |
| [08:40.363] |
Happy Thanksgiving! |
| [08:48.376] |
So welcome. Is this the first time you’re seeing Emma? |
| [08:51.411] |
Yeah.. I think so |
| [08:52.991] |
It’s nice to meet you.Emma |
| [08:56.560] |
Phoebe.-That’s a funny noise. |
| [09:03.878] |
Phoebe? I still need some help here. Right okay. |
| [09:08.031] |
So it’s not just the lie you tell but it’s the way you tell it. For example |
| [09:12.048] |
If you look at the ground when you’re talking, people know you’re lying. |
| [09:16.513] |
I don’t know why this is so hard for me , lying is basically just acting |
| [09:21.027] |
and I am a terrific actor |
| [09:22.298] |
You’re a terrific actor |
| [09:26.986] |
Hey. Where’s the baby? |
| [09:28.929] |
We just put her down for a nap. |
| [09:30.864] |
Listen I was just thinking, you know what would be incredible? |
| [09:34.647] |
If you guys died.. |
| [09:38.869] |
Thank you Amy. |
| [09:41.296] |
No,no then I would get the baby |
| [09:44.304] |
It would be just like a movie. |
| [09:46.598] |
At first I wouldn’t know what to do with her and then I would rise to the occasion |
| [09:48.720] |
I’d get a makeover and get married |
| [09:53.132] |
That’s a great movie! |
| [09:57.380] |
Now listen.Not that you guys could stop me or anything |
| [10:00.166] |
Because you know you’d be dead. |
| [10:02.734] |
But I was thinking about changing her name |
| [10:05.331] |
I’m just not really a big fan of Emily. |
| [10:09.286] |
Emma |
| [10:11.536] |
Emma? Ross wants you. |
| [10:16.053] |
Pheobe! |
| [10:19.269] |
Why does she keep making that noise? |
| [10:25.124] |
Honey I don’t know how to tell you this .. |
| [10:27.131] |
But if something were to happen to Ross or myself |
| [10:31.270] |
you would’t get the baby |
| [10:34.088] |
Well who would? |
| [10:36.338] |
Well we haven’t officially asked them yet |
| [10:39.019] |
But we would want Monica and Chandler |
| [10:42.753] |
I can’t believe you’d want us to raise Emma |
| [10:45.474] |
Oh my God. I’m so moved. |
| [10:47.689] |
I don't believe this.Hold on a second. You guys die |
| [10:49.886] |
and I don’t get your baby? |
| [10:52.718] |
Amy see..we’re a lot closer to Monica and Chandler |
| [10:56.454] |
We see them every day. And truthfully you don’t seem connected to the baby |
| [11:00.656] |
Connected? To what? She’s a lump. |
| [11:06.992] |
You know guys I’ve gotta say this means so much to me |
| [11:09.863] |
I mean that you would trust me ..with your child |
| [11:14.009] |
I mean we all know that Monica and I have been trying to have a baby of our own |
| [11:20.060] |
You know. I’ve had my doubts about my skills as a father. |
| [11:23.132] |
But..that you two ..that you two.. |
| [11:29.204] |
This guy? Seriously? |
| [11:37.527] |
|
| [11:39.252] |
Okay. It’s time for dinner |
| [11:41.477] |
Everyone we’re using our fancy china and it’s very expensive. So please be careful |
| [11:48.756] |
|
| [11:55.426] |
Okay, just to be clear comedy with the plates will not be well-received. |
| [12:06.962] |
Hey..How come my plates less fancy than everyone else’s? |
| [12:13.674] |
Do you not trust me with a fancy plate? |
| [12:16.560] |
No honey..That’s a special plate |
| [12:19.298] |
See..it’s a game.Whoever gets that plate wins. |
| [12:25.290] |
I can’t believe I won! |
| [12:28.715] |
You know this is such a slap in the face . I mean I’m your sister and you would give you baby to these strangers over me |
| [12:36.460] |
Monica is Ross’ sister |
| [12:39.527] |
No Ross’ sister was really fat. |
| [12:44.777] |
That was me |
| [12:47.143] |
No she was this dorky girl in school who followed Rachel around like a puppy |
| [12:51.630] |
Amy you’ve got to stop doing that! |
| [12:55.946] |
|
| [13:00.342] |
Okay.listen I know you’re having a bit of a family crisis but you don’t have to take it out on the plates. |
| [13:06.034] |
I mean in fact I think that everyone should cut the food like this.. |
| [13:15.245] |
See it , this way you protect plates and let’s face it you have fun |
| [13:21.834] |
Okay how about this? If you guys die ..and the crazy plate lady dies |
| [13:28.314] |
Then do I get the baby? |
| [13:31.679] |
No if crazy plate lady.. |
| [13:35.730] |
If Monica dies then I would get Emma.Right? |
| [13:39.482] |
|
| [13:42.916] |
Well,actually. |
| [13:44.235] |
Actually what? |
| [13:45.730] |
It’s just that in that case then Emma would go to my parents |
| [13:52.938] |
What ? - Hurts, doesn’t it? |
| [13:57.604] |
Who has to die for me to get her? |
| [14:00.599] |
|
| [14:07.666] |
So if Moinca’s not around I’m not good enough to raise Emma? |
| [14:11.189] |
No that is not what we’re saying |
| [14:13.920] |
Yeah..he’s lying.He looked down |
| [14:17.861] |
What’s wrong with me? Am I incompetent? |
| [14:20.202] |
Because I managed to survive whatever it is that killed the three of you |
| [14:26.819] |
You’re taking this the wrong way. We think you are going to be a wonderful parent |
| [14:31.788] |
It’s jus， you're more the you know ..fun parent |
| [14:35.738] |
Yeah and we wanna make sure that Emma also has someone like Monica |
| [14:41.171] |
who’s more of a disciplinarian.Someone who can be firm and strict |
| [14:45.570] |
That’s not how you see me ,is it? |
| [14:48.451] |
No you’re all about the fun |
| [14:53.719] |
|
| [14:57.268] |
I may not know a lot about babies but do you really think I’m not capable |
| [15:01.217] |
No. You both are equally capable |
| [15:03.872] |
It’s just you’re strongest when you’re together. |
| [15:06.989] |
Okay, So if we both had Emma and I died，she ‘d have to give her up |
| [15:13.907] |
Sure,Monica would have to give he up |
| [15:16.323] |
|
| [15:17.506] |
I lie better than that right? |
| [15:21.225] |
|
| [15:21.636] |
Let me just get this straight. So my two friends die I get Emma ,then my wife dies.Then Emma |
| [15:27.542] |
the one tiny ray of hope left in my life.. gets taken away from me? |
| [15:31.242] |
There’s your movie. |
| [15:36.057] |
|
| [15:37.555] |
Hey, there you are |
| [15:39.880] |
You disappeared after dinner |
| [15:41.622] |
Did somebody miss me? Was there a child to raise poorly? |
| [15:46.722] |
Ross and Rachel don’t know what they’re saying. |
| [15:50.102] |
It’s not like they’re so responsible.Emma is a product of a bottle of merlot and a five-year-old condom |
| [15:59.044] |
No they’re right. I’m not a strong father figure, and I never will be. |
| [16:03.626] |
No you learn these things. You grow into it. |
| [16:05.280] |
Yeah,but it’s not who I am |
| [16:07.193] |
Everything they said is exactly why I was worried about having a kid. It’s true. |
| [16:11.994] |
And look everybody knows it |
| [16:13.681] |
I don’t know it |
| [16:15.425] |
I wanna have a kid with you because I think you’ll be an amazing dad. |
| [16:19.257] |
At the fun parts and at the hard parts |
| [16:22.712] |
Well can you picture me saying “Go to your room you’re grounded”? |
| [16:25.878] |
Can you hear me say”You’re grounded”? |
| [16:28.492] |
You said that to me last week |
| [16:32.631] |
How hard is it?“No shoes on the furniture!” |
| [16:38.080] |
|
| [16:41.629] |
The producer from Davs left a message asking why I wasn’t at the parade |
| [16:47.464] |
They said everybody’s really pissed off at me. And they all got to meet Santa! |
| [16:53.031] |
It’s okay. I thought of the perfect lie for you. |
| [16:55.577] |
It’s easy to remember and it doesn’t invite a lot of questions. |
| [16:59.299] |
You weren’t at the parade because you had family emergency |
| [17:03.562] |
I like that! Yeah |
| [17:06.528] |
I wasn’t at the parade because I had a family emergency. |
| [17:09.368] |
What happened? |
| [17:11.466] |
My sister’s raccoon came.. No nothing with a raccoon! |
| [17:16.777] |
|
| [17:17.649] |
Wait..what are you doing? - setting the table |
| [17:19.837] |
We thought it might be nice to use the fancy china for dessert, too |
| [17:24.248] |
How nice. Maybe later we can all go blow our noses on my wedding dress. |
| [17:35.417] |
Hey dude you okay? |
| [17:36.878] |
Sorry about before |
| [17:37.927] |
That’s okay.You’re totally right I don't know anything about disciplining a child. |
| [17:42.334] |
But it did hurt my feelings. And I want you to know that if I died ..you don’t get joey |
| [17:53.089] |
|
| [18:02.769] |
In case you hadn’t noticed I’m not talking to you |
| [18:08.250] |
You know.. this is just.. This is classic Rachel |
| [18:11.060] |
Oh yeah right.Remember in high school when I died and didn’t give you my baby? |
| [18:18.298] |
This might be my one chance to have a child Rachel |
| [18:22.336] |
I mean you know that I have been so busy focusing on my career |
| [18:24.168] |
What career? - I’m a decorator |
| [18:28.635] |
You decorate Dad’s office and now you’re a decorator? |
| [18:32.269] |
okay I went to the zoo yesterday.Now I’m a koala bear. |
| [18:39.927] |
Why can’t you ever be supportive? |
| [18:42.018] |
You wanna talk supportive? |
| [18:43.872] |
You didn’t come and visit me when I was in hospital having the baby! |
| [18:48.004] |
You didn’t come see me in the hospital when I was getting my lips done! |
| [18:53.391] |
I did the first time |
| [18:57.980] |
You know what？ You wanna know why I am not giving Emily to you? |
| [19:01.076] |
Emma - |
| [19:01.605] |
Whose side are you on?! |
| [19:05.418] |
I’m not giving you Emma because you can’t handle the responsibility of a child. |
| [19:10.147] |
Well how hard could it be? You do it |
| [19:17.915] |
You wanna know why you don’t want me to have the baby? |
| [19:21.255] |
Because you don’t want me to be happy |
| [19:23.707] |
You have always been jealous of me |
| [19:26.061] |
Jealous of what? |
| [19:27.494] |
Of you lack of responsibility?Your immaturity? your total disregard for other people’s feelings? |
| [19:34.673] |
To name a few |
| [19:38.942] |
You know. You’ve always been like this.You had to have everything. |
| [19:40.906] |
and I couldn’t have anything. |
| [19:44.478] |
Like in junior high, when you stole Timmy from me. I mean do you even realize how much that hurt me? |
| [19:50.722] |
Timmy was my boyfriend and you made out with hime! |
| [19:53.191] |
Come on that was 20 years ago |
| [19:54.340] |
Get over it |
| [19:56.943] |
I cannot believe that I invited you here today! |
| [19:59.877] |
Yeah well you know what I cannot believe |
| [20:01.705] |
That my so-called sister |
| [20:03.808] |
Gets a 30 percent discount from Ralph Lauren. |
| [20:06.693] |
and I still have to pay retail? |
| [20:10.161] |
It’s 45. |
| [20:14.193] |
You bitch |
| [20:18.541] |
You just think you’re so perfect with your new baby and your small apartment |
| [20:26.043] |
Well let me tell you something. |
| [20:28.297] |
Your baby isn’t even that cute |
| [20:32.447] |
Too far Amy.Too far |
| [20:38.279] |
|
| [20:40.183] |
Take it back. -No what are you gonna do ?Make me? |
| [20:41.329] |
Hey man I work out! |
| [20:47.679] |
So do I |
| [20:48.591] |
I do Pilates |
| [20:49.560] |
I do yoga. |
| [20:50.651] |
Bring it on! |
| [20:55.744] |
Put the plates in the boxes! Put the plates in the boxes! |
| [20:57.831] |
Did you just push me? - Yeah I think I did |
| [21:00.000] |
All right that’s it. |
| [21:01.411] |
Forget the bubble wrap!There isn’t time! |
| [21:12.858] |
Oh my god.Shouldn’t we stop this? |
| [21:15.195] |
Are you out of your mind? Let’s throw some jell-O on them! |
| [21:36.733] |
All right that is it! This our apartment and you cannot behave this way! |
| [21:41.880] |
If you can’t act your age you shouldn’t be here at all |
| [21:44.566] |
Those plates may not be as nice as the pretty pink ones that I picked out. |
| [21:50.070] |
but they’re very important to Monica. |
| [21:52.000] |
And I want you to apologize to her, now |
| [21:55.598] |
I'm sorry.-Mon,I’m so sorry |
| [21:58.753] |
Okay That’s better |
| [22:00.293] |
Now I want you to apologize to each other and mean it |
| [22:03.809] |
Sorry. Sorry |
| [22:06.140] |
By the way that fight was totally arousing |
| [22:13.753] |
Dude.Well done. If I die and Rachel dies and Monica dies.you can totally take care of Emma. |
| [22:22.118] |
Yeah,well thanks. |
| [22:24.336] |
So..so now do I get Joey? |
| [22:28.808] |
Okay .but you should know he eats a lot and shoves pennies up his nose. |
| [22:38.903] |
Are you okay?mon? |
| [22:41.109] |
I mean these things happen. |
| [22:43.237] |
I means it’s just a plate.It’s not somebody died |
| [22:47.072] |
It’s all right. You can mourn |
| [22:49.145] |
Thank you. It was so beautiful |
| [22:55.369] |
I’m gonna go to Joey’s and get the pies. |
| [22:57.408] |
Actually not pies.It’s just a pie |
| [23:02.751] |
I don’t care |
| [23:05.013] |
Oh my god. I’ve lost the will to scold |
| [23:12.962] |
Look Amy.. |
| [23:15.315] |
We got a little.. a little out of control over there |
| [23:20.687] |
And I’m sorry. You are my sister and if it really means that much to you |
| [23:28.028] |
So you’re gonna give me the baby? |
| [23:29.839] |
No I was.. I was gonna let you use my Ralph Lauren discount |
| [23:35.308] |
You are not gonna regret this |
| [23:41.740] |
She needs changing. |
| [23:42.723] |
No no no .I’ll get her |
| [23:44.907] |
I am super confident ,totally responsible and fourth in line to raise Emma |
| [23:49.222] |
I’ll be right there,Emma |
| [23:50.356] |
Just let me get my trusty diaper bag here. |
| [23:59.134] |
Well.what do you know?I guess I’ll be the one who dies first |
| [24:18.679] |
Does Monica know about you breaking her plates yet? |
| [24:20.642] |
Nope |
| [24:21.509] |
Broke them all, huh? -Yep |
| [24:23.059] |
You gonna tell her?-Nope |
| [24:27.624] |
Hey .So I’m gonna put the plates back |
| [24:31.052] |
I think you’re right.We shouldn’t use these plates for a long time |
| [24:34.479] |
Like only if the queen comes? |
| [24:35.934] |
Maybe not even then. |
| [24:39.196] |
Hey I did it |
| [24:40.643] |
I told my producer I had a family emergency.He totally bought it |
| [24:44.855] |
Thanks for teaching me how to lie Phebs |
| [24:46.227] |
No problem.Next week,stealing |
| [24:50.791] |
Bye plates |
| [24:51.908] |
You told her you broke all the plates? |
| [24:55.968] |
What？Something happened with the plates? |
| [25:00.133] |
Yeah..this raccoon came in.. |
