| [00:00.00] |
==【Hank】== |
| [00:00.10] |
Find out what your niche is |
| [00:02.07] |
Because that leads to riches |
| [00:05.69] |
==【Hank】== |
| [00:05.79] |
Beer from a can always tastes two degrees cooler than beer from a bottle |
| [00:10.85] |
Even if they're the same temperature |
| [00:13.14] |
I'm don't know why |
| [00:14.28] |
I'm not a physicist |
| [00:15.35] |
But I am a beer drinker |
| [00:17.44] |
==【Hank】== |
| [00:17.54] |
Never drink anything with an umbrella |
| [00:20.66] |
A fruit wedge |
| [00:22.07] |
Or a plastic monkey in it |
| [00:24.46] |
==【Peggy】== |
| [00:24.56] |
Remember |
| [00:25.51] |
Butter first |
| [00:27.06] |
Milk second |
| [00:28.77] |
Then add the cheese powder |
| [00:30.89] |
==【Dale】== |
| [00:30.99] |
Inhale deeply and often |
| [00:34.47] |
You're payin' for the nicotine |
| [00:36.88] |
You might as well get the most out of it |
| [00:39.51] |
==【Hank】== |
| [00:39.61] |
Don't be the type of person who sits around talking about his own genitalia |
| [00:45.00] |
==【Boomhauer】== |
| [00:45.09] |
I tell you what you do man you take one of these little ol' dollar bills man |
| [00:48.67] |
Ol' George Washington on there get one of those cartoon balloons man |
| [00:58.04] |
==【Leanne】== |
| [00:58.14] |
Enjoy your body |
| [01:00.09] |
Use it everywhere you can |
| [01:02.34] |
Feel good about your body |
| [01:05.21] |
Show it to everyone |
| [01:06.86] |
==【Peggy】== |
| [01:06.96] |
Your feet are not as big as you think they are |
| [01:11.23] |
==【Bobby】== |
| [01:11.33] |
Enjoy your body |
| [01:13.21] |
Almost any part can make a fart noise |
| [01:17.69] |
In between your toes |
| [01:20.82] |
Behind your knee |
| [01:23.85] |
Inside the elbow |
| [01:26.85] |
Even behind your ear |
| [01:29.96] |
From your chin to your neck |
| [01:33.36] |
And of course |
| [01:35.41] |
You have your armpit |
| [01:38.00] |
==【Hank】== |
| [01:38.07] |
Always read the directions |
| [01:40.70] |
Enjoy your spatula |
| [01:43.20] |
Use it everywhere you can |
| [01:48.87] |
If it rusts |
| [01:46.22] |
Don't be afraid of what people think of it |
| [01:48.62] |
It is the greatest instrument you will ever own |
| [01:51.91] |
==【Bobby】== |
| [01:52.01] |
Write your locker combination where you'll remember it |
| [01:55.95] |
But not inside your locker |
| [01:58.12] |
==【Cotton】== |
| [01:58.22] |
Love your shins |
| [02:00.43] |
Them's the only ones you got and you'll miss 'em when they're gone |
| [02:05.23] |
Dance! I said dance, monkey! |
| [02:12.00] |
Dance! I said dance, monkey! |
| [02:16.06] |
==【Dale】== |
| [02:16.16] |
Do one thing every day that scares somebody. |
| [02:20.66] |
==【Cotton】== |
| [02:20.76] |
Dance! I said dance, monkey! |
| [02:25.01] |
==【Hank】== |
| [02:25.11] |
Go to the bathroom every chance you can |
| [02:28.85] |
Don't trust a man who spends more than $10 on a haircut |
| [02:36.53] |
Buy American |
| [02:39.35] |
Even if it doesn't work as well |
| [02:41.54] |
==【Bill】== |
| [02:41.64] |
Be kind to your wife |
| [02:44.33] |
You may never know when she just might leave ya for no reason |
| [02:49.18] |
==【Peggy】== |
| [02:49.28] |
Do not read beauty magazines |
| [02:51.81] |
They will only make you feel sorry for those skinny, little drugged out models |
| [02:57.02] |
==【Hank】== |
| [02:57.12] |
Mow against the grain |
| [03:03.21] |
==【Hank】== |
| [03:03.31] |
My lawn is my flag |
| [03:06.14] |
It tells the world |
| [03:07.62] |
Here lives a competent |
| [03:09.51] |
Trustworthy salesman of propane and propane accessories |
| [03:13.64] |
==【Bill】== |
| [03:13.74] |
Dance |
| [03:14.99] |
Even if you have no where to do it but alone in your living room |
| [03:19.11] |
Alone |
| [03:20.01] |
With a mop |
| [03:21.20] |
==【Hank】== |
| [03:21.30] |
Never throw out an old comb |
| [03:24.00] |
A comb is one tool that last a lifetime |
| [03:29.16] |
==【Dale】== |
| [03:29.26] |
Set aside time every day to check to see if your fly is up |
| [03:36.11] |
==【Hank】== |
| [03:36.21] |
Don't go to therapy |
| [03:38.47] |
It'll only screw you up more |
| [03:41.10] |
==【Hank】== |
| [03:41.20] |
Don't waste money on fancy soap |
| [03:45.01] |
==【Hank】== |
| [03:45.11] |
Never, ever trust a man who is wearing a beret |
| [03:50.84] |
==【Hank】== |
| [03:50.94] |
If there's a better friend than a roll of duct tape I'd like to meet him |
| [03:55.83] |
==【Boomhauer】== |
| [03:55.93] |
I tell you one thing man in any kind of relationship is dang ol' communication |
| [04:02.73] |
It's the most important thing in any kind of relationship |
| [04:06.42] |
I tell you what man what we have here is a failure to communicate |
